Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Happy Independence Day!

Well, I'm sure by the title you're probably thinking I've either lost my mind or I just don't know the date. Truth is, I know this date all too well. May 8, 1999, I made a decision that would change my life forever. I left an incredibly abusive situation to save the lives of my daughter and myself.

Yep, the strong woman that I am, was not always that way. I have been beaten, raped and abused. I have been put down, knocked down, knocked out, and attacked. I have been made to feel that I had no worth and my life meant nothing. I've been bruised and battered, gagged and bound. I have felt the wrath of a miniature baseball bat and glass bottles come down upon my head repeatedly. I've been beaten with samurai swords, metal hangers, and thrown across the room half-conscious only to have my head greeted by the metal corner of a steamer trunk. I learned to create a perfectly time-stamped paper trail to account for my whereabouts to avoid further abuse. I have been poked & prodded, had my clothes ripped off of me, and been humiliated. I have been enslaved.

Yet, here I stand today to tell the tale.

By now you may be wondering who the hell had me held hostage and kept me in such a place that I would have suffered such. My captor was none other than a man that I once called "husband." You got it! I was one of those battered women that you hear about on the news and read about in the papers. No one knew my story (or at least I thought). I learned to hide behind fake smiles. If ever there was a "glamour" spell that was utilized, I used it daily. Never one to admit defeat, and an insanely stubborn refusal to be "just another divorce statistic," I continued on living that life. I was not only physically beaten down, but mentally and emotionally as well. The chains that bound up my spirit were so heavy that I felt I could never leave as there would never be anyone better. He was the best I was going to get.

I had left him once. He had been arrested when he showed up where I was working, threatening to kill me. That was dumb. My employers had me well-protected. We separated and I filed for divorce. A few months later I went back, convinced we could make it work. I got pregnant. My pregnancy was the most peaceful and happy time of that entire relationship. Not once was a hand laid on me. I was treated so well. I thought things were truly on the mend. Wrong thought. Time went on and everything resumed. I remember being at work one day when the repairman turned to me and said, "You know, one day you're going to run away from all of this (meaning my husband; he knew him as we worked in the same place) and end up running into the arms of someone who really loves you." Had I really become so transparent? Even a glamour can wear off if the person has been beaten down enough I guess.

I was miserable, knew I was miserable, but just kept going. The turning point came when all of that anger, all of that rage my former husband had turned to our daughter. I watched in horror as he got up in her little 2 year-old face and screamed at her. She had moved his precious $5,000 watch and he was pissed off. Personally, I never understood the need for that expensive a watch, and he owned several. But, that was the straw that broke the camel's back. He could abuse me all he wanted, but there was no way I would allow for him to turn that on MY daughter.

We left on Mother's Day that year, May 8, 1999, and I have never looked back. That beautiful little girl I took with me will be 16 later this year and I am so happy to be here to say the gorgeous woman she is turning into.

I celebrate this day every year. It was only a few years ago, that my daughter asked me why I silently celebrate that day. She wanted to know what it meant. So I sat her down and explained. Unless you have been in my shoes, you could never understand the "victory" of leaving that type of situation. Now, she & I celebrate each year. While I still like to celebrate silently, I share in the way that she chooses to celebrate as well. After 13 years, I decided to type this up.

Yesterday, I walked into my living room to have my 8 year-old daughter tell me I couldn't see what she was doing. This morning, she gave me a kiss and said, "Happy Independence Day, Mommy" and gave me this card.

Last year, Celia Farran ran a contest called "The Everyday Goddess Contest." The winner would be chosen on Mother's Day, which happened to be May 8th. I entered in my daughter's name. While I didn't "win," my daughter absolutely loved the video I put together. If you would like to view it, here it is:

In the last 13 years, there have been countless hugs, kisses, tears, triumph, joy & love shared. A mother's love is an incredible thing.

So, that's my story. Believe when I say that's the short version. So forgive me while I linger a little longer while enjoying things with my kids, cartwheel through wildflowers, dance barefoot in the rain and live my carefree life as only an "extreme free spirit" can. I've earned it, and now you know why.



Sunday, May 6, 2012

And the Giveaways Just Keep Getting Better!

For any of you familiar with Author Laura DeLuca's blog, you already know that in celebration of the release of her books, she has been doing giveaways on her blog. The giveaways are fantastic, I must say. If you haven't had the chance to stop over today, GO DO IT!

Right now, Laura has an AMAZING piece from Strega Jewelry entitled Mother of Sighs. Did I mention that it's AMAZING? It is a gorgeous piece. The giveaway is running now through May 26th. If you are looking for an amazing piece that will provide calming and encouraging energies, then head on over and enter today. Even if this piece isn't your "cup of tea," I encourage you to visit Strega Jewelry's site and check out the other incredible pieces there as well.

Need the link for Laura's blog? Just click here.

I entered. Now go get your chance!



Saturday, May 5, 2012

An Incredible Compliment & Some Cool News!

Wow... So hold the phone! Two posts from me in one day! What am I thinking? Honestly, I wanted to share some things with you. Several months ago I was asked if I would be interested in being interviewed by a woman who is currently writing a book on the way women worship. I was very interested and intrigued, and even more so after I was able to read what the "mission" is behind this book. I truly believe that everyone has their own path and that it is up to each individual to find what works for them. (I wish the school systems would figure that out when it comes to teaching to different learning types - I'll save that for another day) So, I whole-heartedly agreed to this interview. The questions were not easy run-of-the-mill type questions, but, rather, ones that required deep thought and introspection. I got 3 questions in on the writing portion and had stopped, not because I was unsure of what to write, but because I knew there really wasn't enough room. I had my interview with the author over the phone and we went through each of the questions in-depth. I then went back, and, taking my time, re-answered those same questions on paper. We were also asked to include poems, prayers, anecdotes, inspirational quotes, etc. along with the questions. I retyped many of the things that are incredibly moving to me and carry with them great meaning for me and the path that I walk. I sent all 12 pages along with pictures from rituals, of my various altars, etc off to the author. She responded to me letting my know how truly overwhelmed and moved she was by my responses in a positive way.

Now let's flash forward to May 4th - Star Wars Day all over Facebook. I don't think a single person could have gotten away without seeing "May the 4th be with you." That phrase, by the way, makes me giggle. Anyway, a quote by Yoda came across my page, and I had forgotten how much I truly loved this particular one and how well it fit my chosen path. I took the quote and shot a message off to the author asking her to please add that to my list of quotes that have special meaning to me.

So why am I telling you all this? Not only did she let me know she would do that, but she then re-posted the quote on her wall and paid me a truly incredible compliment in the process. Here's the quote, as well as, what she wrote afterwards:

"Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hmm? Hmm. And well you should not. For my ally is the Force, and a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter. You must feel the Force around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes. Even between the land and the ship." - Yoda (via Bridget Di Luzio--one who walks her path with honor, dignity and grace)
You inspire me, you help my spirit remember it's Truth. — 

To have someone publicly say that I walk my path with honor, dignity and grace was just mind-blowing and humbling. I was completely moved to tears. There are days when you wonder if you're doing the right thing, and then there are days like this when you know that you truly are on the right path. Everything I do has purpose and meaning, and apparently I'm not the only one that sees it. So, yeah, I was completely amazed by this public statement, and graciously thankful to be recognized in this way.


And now for some really cool news from author Laura DeLuca.

To celebrate the release of Destiny Unveiled, you can now get your copy of Destiny by Laura DeLuca for FREE on Smashwords from now through Monday, May 7, 2012. Here's the info:
Remember, the offer is only good on SMASHWORDS until May 7, so grab your copy today!

Coupon Code: DY64R
Expires: May 7, 2012


You read that right. You can get Destiny for FREE right now through Monday, May 7, 2012 on Smashwords! Well? What are you waiting for? Go get your copy!



And the Winner Is... .

Happy Cinco de Mayo! It's time to announce the winner. I apologize for not posting this last night, but in all honesty, I fell asleep trying to get my youngest to sleep. Time to recharge the "mom batteries" under the full moon. Anyway, on with the winner... .

Congratulations to Catherine Carey! 
I have sent you an email, Cathy, so if you could just please respond back your prizepack will be sent off to you.

Thank you to everyone that participated in the drawing.

Now for some coffee as I feel like I've been run over by a truck and then off to the Amish Market for some yummy goodness.

Have a wonderful weekend, everyone! Make sure to take the time to enjoy the full moon tonight as it is the Super Moon.


Thursday, May 3, 2012

It's Almost Here!

How was your Beltane/May Day? Did anyone do anything fun? Well, now that May is here, that means it's nearly time for the Full Moon. And this month, the full moon means.....It'll be time for the giveaway of the Destiny Prizepack! I hope everyone is ready. I'm really excited as I have never done a giveaway on my blog before. I'll be announcing the winner shortly, so stay tuned.

Also, for those of you that listen in to my radio show, Raven's Circle, with your kids or grandkids, be on the listen! I may be doing a giveaway there in the next month or so.

Right now, I've got to get back to reading. I have some new reviews coming your way and I want to get everything ready. I'm also running the radio lineup on Veetle for CauldronFM for the next couple days while the producer is on a business trip.

Sorry for the long radio silence since the last blog. I've just been busy. Not that THAT is anything new, but exciting stuff coming your way!!!